It has been 6 months since I ended my marriage of 27 years last August 2009.  Life has been wonderful to me and there are 2 kinds of reactions that I get:The one from my “in-laws” is hostile.  I am barred from all family gatherings from his side.  Nonetheless, my 2 sister-in-laws (ex-brother-in-laws’ wives) are still in touch with me.  Occasionally, we will go for meals and catch-up on what is happening.

My own family has been very supportive, especially my children.  They are sensitive kids and I really want to thank them for helping me through this period.  My stand is that he is still their father and he is welcome to join any family functions where the children are involved.  Other than my children’s birthdays and mine, he has avoided other functions involving my other family members.

For my mum, accepting the separation initially was a pain to her.  She has since accepted the fact and seeing me cheerful again was a consolation to her.   My own siblings had been supportive in their silent ways, respecting my decision.

For the past one year, close friends who knew about my relationship challenge have been giving me moral support.  I really appreciate the time they had taken to accommodate me when I was down.

The painful decision took me one year to deliberate after weighing the pros and cons.  Without financial, emotional and physical support from your spouse and still burden with taking care of 4 children, the strain was too much to bear.  I broke down in Dec 2008 where I left home for 2 nights, just to think things over.  We went through 2 rounds of counseling with the situation remaining status quo.  That’s when I make the decision . . .

And what have I been doing these past 6 months . . .

• I was involved in the Parenting Conference held on 23 Jan 2010 where preparation started way back in Sep 2009.  The event was supported by 2 government bodies.  We had more than 10 sponsors and the team of 7 really worked our heart out.
• In Nov 2009, I was offered a job in a bookstore and started worked in Dec 2009.  After 2 months’ probation, my boss confirmed my appointment.  This is the third month and I am still negotiating for more pay to compensate for the amount of time I spend in the company.  Very positive environment and I kind of like it.
• In Dec 2009, I also took on the role of co-ordinator with a secondary school.  Something new to me but I am one person who enjoys learning new things.

Life is short and I still look on to every day as a new day.  Every one has a choice how they want to live and I have chosen mine.  The years ahead may get lonelier when my children start they own families.  Well, who knows . . . I may find a second Mr Right.  Ha ha . . .